Letter to my ex-wife

Image result for i still care for you even if you are far

I still think about you everyday

Most days, you pop up in my mind so often, I would probably lose count

I love you deeply

You probably still hate me, or at least, are very angry and hurt that I left

Or maybe you actively try to forget my existence

I can understand that

I don’t regret my decision, but I do wish I had done some things differently

There are things I didn’t know at the time that I know now

I did the best that I could

I am grateful for every moment we had together

I would not take one second back

I’m sorry if I ever gave you the impression that I didn’t want to be with you

I know I was distant at times

Especially towards the end

I was trying to figure out what was going on with me

I didn’t know I wasn’t happy until I knew

After that realization, I was trying to understand why I wasn’t happy anymore and how I could fix it

How I could fix us

If I had a choice, I would have wanted us to stay together

I really did want to grow old with you

I think you would have made a wonderful mother

I hope someday, you are

I always thought you were beautiful, no matter how you felt

I hope you feel beautiful now without being told so

I pray for you

I pray that you find peace and love

I pray for your growth and protection

Maybe you don’t want my prayers, but I can’t help it

You are a part of me, even though you are no longer in my life

I do miss you

I miss the connection we had

I hope you are able to find that with someone else, only better

I did try

I gave us everything I had

I hope one day you are able to understand

But I won’t hold it against you if you don’t

I hope you kept that picture I gave you before I left

I hope you understood what I meant when I said don’t ever forget who you are inside

There is a strong, capable woman inside of you

I just had to remove myself from the equation

We grew so much together and then we stopped

I could feel us suffocating each other, despite our best intentions

Maybe someday you’ll agree with me

For now, I’ll just have to hope




P.S. I hope Harlow and Samson are well. I still think of them. And your aunts.









About samlobos

I am an avid fan of creating narratives in my head about random experiences and quotes for future books I will probably not write. I harbor a 15 year old girl in my psyche and like to solve world issues when I'm half asleep. View all posts by samlobos

5 responses to “Letter to my ex-wife

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