Kryptonite

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I’ve been watching a lot of Sex and the City on Amazon Prime

I didn’t see it when it was actually on, but I saw the movies and  loved them when they came out

So I decided I should watch the show that inspired the movies

I find myself relating a lot to their experiences

It’s kinda comforting, actually

If I had to compare myself to one of them, I’d say I’m most like Miranda

And Mr. Artist is a lot like Steve

Watching a show all about relationships makes you start thinking about your own

I realized something today

I realized I’m in way deeper than I thought

I didn’t see him yesterday because I was studying and he was spending time with his brother

Today he was visiting his uncle so we didn’t get to talk as much as we usually do

I was doing my new favorite thing to do, eating and watching Sex and the City when I started to feel antsy

He hadn’t responded to my last text and I knew it was because he was with his family

Still, I was waiting for him

When I finally got a text alert, I perked up and checked it immediately

It wasn’t him

Instead it was some friends trying to get together for Knotts Scary Farm

I half heartedly read the message

I knew the next few pings were the others responding to that group message so I took my time checking my phone

If it wasn’t Mr. Artist, I wasn’t that interested

Then it hit me, I am royally fucked

Normally I’m so excited that someone, anyone, is texting me that I check my messages right away and I don’t really care who it is (product of someone who didn’t have many friends growing up)

What was this whole disappointed-I-want-my-boyfriend mopey feeling about?

I feel like I’ve been in denial about how much of a hold he has on my heart

I pretend like he’s the smitten one, that I’d be fine if he called it quits

But who am I kidding?

He could crush me with a single word

It frightens me

I know he would rather take a bullet than hurt me, but things happen

I’ve been heart broken and disappointed by those I’ve loved the most

And I love him, so very much

My heart is his in a way that it has never been anyone else’s

He is so much more than I ever expected

I joke and tell him that I’m his kryptonite

But the truth is,

he’s mine

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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About samlobos

I am an avid fan of creating narratives in my head about random experiences and quotes for future books I will probably not write. I harbor a 15 year old girl in my psyche and like to solve world issues when I'm half asleep. View all posts by samlobos

9 responses to “Kryptonite

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