(30) days of Sam

I love the movie (500) days of Summer.

I identify with the character of Summer (Zooey Deschanel), the girl that Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) falls in love with.

To some, she is a frustrating character to watch.

Especially for those who identify more with Tom.

She says one thing and does another.

She seems fickle and indecisive.

Maybe even impulsive.

But really, she just isn’t sure.

She knows enough to warn Tom that she can’t guarantee him a happy ending with her.

She knows that her past experiences have been a certain way and maybe he challenges them more than others have.

She knows that she likes him, more than she meant to.

But she isn’t sure.

There is a scene in towards the end of the movie that just shoots straight into my heart every time.

For anyone who hasn’t seen it yet, run see it, then read the rest of this post because I’m going to spoil it for you.

She is sitting on a bench overlooking the city with Tom.

She is newly married.

He is still confused by this.

Here is the dialogue that ensues:

Tom: “You never wanted to be anybody’s girlfriend and now you’re somebody’s wife.”

Summer: “It surprised me too.”

T: “I don’t think I’ll ever understand that. I mean, it doesn’t make sense.”

S: “It just happened.”

T: “That’s what I don’t understand. What just happened?”

S: I just, I just woke up one day and I knew.”

T: “Knew what?”

S: “What I was never sure of with you.”

That last sentence.

It kills me because that’s how I feel.

Not only with Mr. Artist, but with others as well.

In college, I broke a boy’s heart because I couldn’t fathom the idea of being “tied down” to one guy, the thought of being someone’s girlfriend seemed too constricting.

A month later, I fell head over heels in love with my now ex-wife and devoted my foreseeable future to her without hesitation.

I don’t set out to be confusing or hurt anyone.

I’d rather get hurt than be the one to inflict pain.

But the only way to know for sure is to try.

And sometimes in the trying, someone gets hurt.

I don’t know until I know.

There are a lot of things I don’t know.

Many things I’m unsure of.

But once I’m sure,

I’m sure.

That I know.






About samlobos

I am an avid fan of creating narratives in my head about random experiences and quotes for future books I will probably not write. I harbor a 15 year old girl in my psyche and like to solve world issues when I'm half asleep. View all posts by samlobos

11 responses to “(30) days of Sam

  • laurelwolfelives

    Wow. This is powerful. That line “what I was never sure of with you” is gut-wrenching and so poignant. It flashed in my mind, that if I ever did really know what love was, that’s what I would be thinking about Loser.
    You seem to be pensive and maybe even struggling a bit about him…but if it’s not there….it’s not there.

  • thelonelyauthorblog

    A powerfully written post. Yeah, I love that movie as well.

  • survivednarc

    Good stuff! I don’t remember this movie in full, it was a long time ago. All I can say is, it is completely fine to be unsure and so on. The only thing I think that people should do in those situations is be honest, and try to end things with the other person as soon as possible, (as soon as a person “knows” that they are “too unsure”).. cause wasting a person’s time is just not very nice… πŸ™‚ I think I may have been a little bit annoyed with the character in the movie, the girl, perhaps. But if I was, it must have been cause she dragged things out for too long (?) I honestly don’t remember… lol.

    But I think you have done a very good job here with this person, you have been honest and you haven’t wasted anyone’s time. So, = you are a cool person!! : ) Hugs

    • samlobos

      Ha,ha! I’m glad I’m still cool in your book. I know I’m an indecisive person so I try to be extremely careful when even contemplating trying out a relationship with someone, unless I’m sure. That’s why I “broke it off” twice before with Mr. Artist because I wasn’t sure and I didn’t want to hurt him. That’s why I was honest from the beginning with him. And also why I can’t keep going along with him like I had been. Because once I’m sure, I can’t string the person along, even if they say they are okay with it. Doesn’t feel right.

  • Issa

    I love that movie too. Oh crap did I just that out loud.

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