The Graduate. Image taken from Google Images.


I’ve been receiving lots of messages on OkCupid from guys in their early 20’s.

Like a decent amount of messages.

The average has been 23-24, but I’ve had 20 year olds message me.

I usually politely decline and tell them I’m way too old and it would be weird or I just don’t respond.

The one’s that I’ve politely declined have asked me what is wrong with it and why it’s weird.

Some have begged me to give them a chance.

Am I couger material?

I mean, I know I look younger than I am.

The average age people guess I am is 26, although I’ve gotten 21 before.

Obviously those people have met some old looking 21 year olds.

Recently I went on a date with this older man, 42, at a Starbucks in a University city.

It was packed with students studying for tests and finishing papers.

I found myself being checked out by this young, attractive guy, who was obviously a student.

Hey, apparently I still got it.

Still, I feel like a pedophile even talking to guys this young.

I mean, they are babies!!!

Plus, they are so fickle!

The one’s who have persuaded me to give them my number texted a couple of times and then disappeared.

I know I’m looking for something serious, but from the influx of young guys interested in me, I’m a little curious.

Maybe I could have a bit of fun…


About samlobos

I am an avid fan of creating narratives in my head about random experiences and quotes for future books I will probably not write. I harbor a 15 year old girl in my psyche and like to solve world issues when I'm half asleep. View all posts by samlobos

8 responses to “Couger?

  • mysecretme75

    I was told you can’t be a cougar until you’re over 40. And besides these guys are chasing you. I may have it all wrong but I thought a cougar preyed on the younger men. I think you just look young enough and you’re beautiful, why wouldn’t they try? I say roll with it. But wth do I know? I haven’t had a date or serious interest I could pursue in 14 years. When I start dating I’ll let you know if I get approached as a cougar or not. 😉

  • survivednarc

    Oh no, I had these too, on the dating site… early 20’s, quite a few of them, sending messages.. Unfortunately (or luckily maybe!) I have never been interested… usually my age range has been 5 years plus/minus as a max.. 😊 but who knows… as you say, just for fun maybe…. ha ha thanks this made me laugh. 😁

  • crystalempath

    I say you don’t owe anyone anything other than to have a chance to see if you enjoy each others company; whatever that means. As you are an adult (and so are they depending on where in the world you are located I guess for the 20 yr old) you can say no or yes as you please. No one is the boss of you..except yourself! I say, Play it by ear and do whatever it is that feels right for you at any given time. You may even meet a friend who has similar interest or hobbies or is just great dinner company. What’s to lose? The world is full of lessons and lovely people, as well as not so lovely people. What’s one coffee, lunch or dinner…its simply a chance to grow. Good luck. Be true to you whatever you do. ❤

    • samlobos

      Ha,ha! I suppose I have to let go of my ageism. I guess because I’m a therapist and work with students as old as 20, it feels weird to talk and connect with other people close to that age. I forget that not every young adult is like the ones I work with. I’ll be sure to blog about any adventures I have should any of these messages turn into something more. 😉

  • Ocean Bream

    Nothing wrong with a bit of fun 🙂

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