I decided that I can’t do the friends with benefits thing with Mr. K.
I like him too much and I know myself, my emotions will start creeping up on me and then I’ll be screwed.
So I told him. I was completely honest and upfront with him, which we have been with each other from the start, which is probably why we connected so quickly in the first place.
He really is a good guy. Rough around the edges and emotionally unavailable at the moment, but he’s a decent guy. I am certain of that now.
We get each other. We are insanely attracted to each other. (I know I haven’t described him so I’ll give a quick overview: Blue eyed, sliver haired guy (grey hair is genetic) with a gorgeous body. He’s 32 and originally from Ohio. Great smile. My friends approved of his picture).
Most importantly, I’ve realized that I’m really comfortable with him and I trust him because he’s proven to be fairly trustworthy overall. That’s a big deal to me.
I know I ranted yesterday. I do that when I’m frustrated and confused. It’s the Scorpio in me. I can tear a person to shreds and lash out, especially if I’m feeling vulnerable. And that’s what it was. I was hurt with him because I was already getting attached. (He apologized this morning by the way. Sent me a text first thing.)
So I ended it. He understood, said he didn’t want to see me get hurt and because we genuinely like talking to each other, we are going to stay friends. Well, as good of friends you can be with someone you slept with and can’t be trusted to be alone in a room together because clothes are going to come off otherwise. It’s probably a good thing he lives 2 hours away from me.
The timing just isn’t right. He’s coming off of a long term relationship that is ending sour so he wants simple and casual, and while I’m not necessarily looking for marriage, I’m not looking for just casual sex either.
I told him that if in the future he is ready to pursue something more than just casual, to keep me in mind. He responded “Of course.”
I was very tempted to go for another romp with Mr. K before officially calling us “just friends” but he said that we should probably stop now. He has his daughter for the next 3 weekends anyway, so it’s a sign. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little disappointed. But it’s for the best.
Other news on the dating front, I just started talking to two other guys from OkCupid.
One of them seems too good to be true:, nerdy, adorably attractive, loves to cook, affectionate and communicative. I want him. Have you ever seen someone or something and thought, “I need that in my life.” Yeah, that’s what I thought when I saw this guy and even more so after talking to him. Thing about me when I see someone or something I want, I pursue it/them and I pursue it/them hard. I’m trying not to scare him away…This might take some practice.
The other guy is a really cool and surprisingly hilarious. He’s been talking to me off and on since I’ve been on the site but only gathered up the time and courage to ask for my number today. I’m not as interested in him but then again, you never know, right?
Anyway, maybe I’ll get a handle on this dating thing after all. If I’ve learned anything this year, it’s that anything can happen.