In the quiet

It is now, in the quiet, when I feel most alone

That is when the memories flood in

and I miss you most

The fun times we had together

The places we would go

The jokes we used to share

The funny stories I loved to hear about your childhood, even as I had already memorized them

The way we thought alike and wanted the same things

The routine we had that felt so comfortable, like a warm blanket on a bitter cold day

The way you used to feel like home no matter where we were

I almost forgot the way we used to laugh

The sound of your voice reaching a pitch so high it sometimes hurt my ears

I almost forgot the way we used to talk to each other,

it was so nurturing, so loving, so tender

I almost forgot how you looked when you would smile at me

the sparkle in your eyes that told me volumes without any sound

I almost forgot how it was to feel you

to put my arms around your soft body

The feel and weight of your big head when I would hug it

It makes me want to cry

Knowing that this will never be again

Because I lost the good with the bad

I traded finding myself for those memories

I lost my past to find my future

My marriage for my freedom

My partner for my identity

It doesn’t seem quite real to me, that I lived a complete life with you

because my life seems so empty now,

now in the quiet

now that I’m alone


About samlobos

I am an avid fan of creating narratives in my head about random experiences and quotes for future books I will probably not write. I harbor a 15 year old girl in my psyche and like to solve world issues when I'm half asleep. View all posts by samlobos

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