I am a horrible faker. If something is bothering me, I’ll let you know in one way or another. It is usually through my complete inability to put on a “happy” face. Trust me, when I’m miserable, I look miserable. I have been working on being more assertive and verbalizing my thoughts instead of letting my bratty face do the talking. Yes, deep down inside of me, there is that four-year old that wants to pout and whine until she gets her way. Yes, I can be incredibly cute (that observation might be up for debate, as noted by my wife) but I know that I am not four years old, I am in fact 31. So I have to do grown up things like attend functions I don’t want to go to, see people I would rather not, and accept things that don’t make sense.
Wait, how is that any different from being a child?
So, back to my original thought, grown ups try so hard to cover up their real feelings and save face, something I have never been completely comfortable with. I can rein it in when it’s necessary, I just don’t like to do it. It feels fake. I like when things are out loud, when it’s just said. “Name it to tame it”, that’s something a therapist told me once and the power that comes with practicing that is amazing. I’m a work in progress, which will become more obvious as I continue to write. So as I air out my own personal dirty laundry, please be gracious with my thoughts as they are flawed and probably a little bit quirky.